Field lens - Cheap eyepiece used as mulch. Herschel Wedge - Agressively pulling up the wasteband of an observer's shorts while he is bent-over, observing the sun. Wedge overlook - A crowd gathered to watch you give someone a Hershel Wedge. Secondary mirror - Telescope mirror purchased on eBay from Taiwanese seller. Baffle - Peppering one's Stary Party talk at the elementary school with esoteric technical jargon. Spider - Cobwebs found inside telescope tubes after winter storage. Flocking - What your wife wishes you would do instead of going to the star party. GoTo - The first half of an expression used when someone laughs at your telescope. Tracking error - Arriving at the Pit-n-pole only to get a phone call telling you the star party is at Lakeside. Parallax - Two laxes. Declination - Turning-down an offer to look through someone else's telescope. Nagler - A wife who regularly complains about your involvement in astronomy. Diffraction limit - When you just can't take even one more astronomy-related algorithm. Tube currents - Wild berries growing on your observatory-mounted telescope. Newtonian Reflector - Mirror used to examine the backside of fig newtons. Enhanced Coating - When it's so cold you need both parka and insulated coveralls. Mirror Stripping - Taking off one's clothes in front of the mirror, often to music. Tripod - When you repeatedly submit photos to APOD without success. Planisphere - Irrational fear of flat surfaces. Field Of View - Rural observing site. Prism - Where astronomical criminals are incarcerated. 4 Place Log Table - Picnic furniture at SPOC Globular Cluster - What a Snickers becomes when left on the dash of the car in summer. Galaxy - Laxative for women. Cone error - Forgetting to put the covers on the lawn sprinklers. Counterweight - Complaining about the weight one's wife has gained in recent years. (not recommended) Observing run - Not wanting to leave the eyepiece and dashing to the restroom at the last possible moment. (also not recommended) Pyrex - A fire that has been extinguished. Asteroids - Rectal inflammation due to too many hours in the observing chair. Finder Scope - Helping a female club member remember where she left her telescope.