HB Arnett's "Lite" <mailto:hbarnett@fiber.net> hbarnett@fiber.net 801 372 0819 Vol. 38, Issue 8, September 17, 2018 Who Cut the Cheese? BYU Makes Big Stink Nationally With 24-21 Upset Win Over Wisconsin Odor: a distinctive smell, especially an unpleasant one. Aroma: a distinctive, typically pleasant smell Depending on which sideline you were on, BYU's 24-21 cutting of Wisconsin's Big Ten Cheese, did leave a stink (odor) in the Dairy State, but it was a welcome aroma in the Beehive state where the BYU Cougars haven't smelled anything so sweet since Max Hall carved a chunk of cheddar out of No. 3 Oklahoma in 2009 in Dallas. Amazing what one win on the road against a ranked team will do for a team's cheese culture. Last year BYU football was Velveeta. They were processed 9 times in the loss column by good cheese, bad cheese and stinky cheese teams. BYU made the jump last Saturday from processed to premium on the national cheese chart of football. The Cougars appeared in the AP poll at No. 25 with their win over Wisconsin. We all have different tastes and favorites when it comes to cheese, but here are a few of mine that came to mind after watching BYU take down Wisconsin. Pule.is considered the most expensive cheese in the world. It goes for $600 per pound. Next year, Sione Takitaki should be able to buy a truckload of this cheese after he gets a huge signing bonus check from some NFL team. If he can stay healthy, he earned a truckload of NFL cash with his performance against Wisconsin. Pule is not just the most expensive cheese, but also one of the rarest of them all. It takes 25 liters of milk from a Balkan donkey from Siberia to make one kilogram of the cheese. Takitaki's performance against the Badgers was rare and rewarding. It was rare to see a BYU defender be that dominant and rewarding for his NFL future. Swiss.BYU's offensive line played like this popular cheese filled with gaping holes. That is exactly what this Ryan Pugh/Jeff Grimes crew did to Wisconsin's vaunted front seven. They gashed and gnashed a defensive front that has been and still is very good. My understanding of Swiss cheese is that it doesn't have to be aged to be good. Neither does BYU's current offensive line. Four of the starters on this unit did not play last year. Three are redshirt freshmen and one is a redshirt sophomore. With Keanu Saleapaga taking over the starting left guard spot from Thomas Shoaf, that means that there were three redshirt freshmen o-linemen that played the entire game against Wisconsin. The other two were James Empey and Brady Christensen. The "big cheese" of this line is just a sophomore. That would be Tristen Hoge. The lone senior starter is Austin Hoyt. Can't wait to see how this group, like good cheese, ages.
From Goat Cheese to Monterey Jack.I don't like goat cheese and I didn't like Aleva Hifo last season either. He was a goat to often for my tastes. He missed assignments, couldn't make the clutch catch and was very ordinary in my eyes. I love Monterey Jack Cheese and I now love Aleva Hifo's game. He is the go-to offensive player for the Cougars. He always had athleticism, but now it is obvious to all just how athletic and valuable he is in this new Jeff Grimes offense.
Jarlsberg.comes from faraway Norway. BYU now has a kicker that can make field goals from far away in Skyler Southam. It was his 45 yard-down-the-middle kick in the fourth quarter that gave the Cougars the win. Jarlsberg is the closest cheese I could find that reminded me of Janikowski, as in Sebastian Janikowski, the phenomenal kicker who has hung around the NFL for two decades. BYU will only get four seasons out of Southam, but when he hits game winners like he did against Wisconsin, I will think of Jarlsberg, Janikowski and jumping for joy at Camp Randall Stadium. Provolone.Maybe now, national broadcasters and pundits will leave Provolone with their snarky comments about a stone-cold sober school and 25-year-old quarterbacks. Beating Wisconsin may not alleviate all the provincial pronouncements about Provo, but it will now put the focus back on football and less on the effete evaluations of the national press and at times the Salt Lake press. Speaking of effete, doesn't that rhyme with defeat as in No. 6 Wisconsin's 24-21 loss to BYU? Muenster.It's not a big stretch to go from Muenster to monster. BYU's defensive line played like monsters against Wisconsin's so called best offensive line in the country. Give Kalani Sitake another year or two of recruiting and we will actually have a legitimate monster front four. These guys played their guts out and were instrumental in the win. This really was a full roster performance from this group. If a defensive lineman dressed, he played against Wisconsin. Gouda.is a semi-hard to hard cow's milk cheese from Holland. Like cheddar, its quality and flavor can vary wildly from the mild, creamy wax-coated lunchbox versions to those specimens that are hard, crumbly, and deeply flavorful. This, in my opinion, describes Tanner Mangum's BYU career. He has been fantastic, ordinary and sometimes awful. Against Wisconsin, his performance may have seemed mild, but he was masterful in managing the game. My opinion was that Mangum was gouda good and did what coaches told him to do to win this game. It appeared to me that he was told to not take a sack and not throw into traffic and leave the game to the trenches. Mangum did what he was told and didn't get enough credit for this win. His 89 yards passing were mild, but his texture on the game was dynamic and needed in a hostile environment. I give Mangum a very gouda grade. Taleggio.Taleggio smells sort of like... feet. Rich, buttery, meaty, feet. I have no idea what Squally Canada's feet smell like, but I do know that he leads the Cougars in putting his feet in the endzone. He leads BYU in touchdowns with 5 scores. If he just had a touch more speed, he could have at least 8 touchdowns this season. As admirable as his touchdown totals are, his most impressive statistic in my opinion is 0. As in 0 fumbles in 51 carries. He is also Taleggio tough. His grittiness and toughness inside the five-yard line has been impressive. BYU's Big Blue/Bleu Cheese.Whatever your taste in cheese, BYU Football's Big Cheese, Kalani Sitake, has something for everybody. He is animated, he is excitable, he is motivating, he can jump high with a big play and get low after a bitter loss. He is aging quite well as the head football coach for the Cougars. He has had his stinky moments, but his aroma arrow is trending up. You may have been happy and thrilled about BYU's big win, but I guarantee you weren't as happy and thrilled as Sitake was. Personally, I am not a connoisseur of cheese. My expertise lies in cheese burgers and Cheetos. I am even less sophisticated when it comes to choosing the appropriate beverage to accompany a good cheese plate. I hear wine is supposed to be a good compliment to cheese. I don't drink wine, but I do imbibe liberally with Mountain Dew and Dr Pepper. I'm happy to report that my cellar of Dew and Pepper now looks safe, thanks to the big Wisconsin win. Seven wins now looks like it will happen. In case you missed some of the reaction from Wisconsin fans and media, try these stories on for size and sympathy. Losing isn't something Badger fans and press are used to. Milwaukee <https://www.jsonline.com/story/sports/college/uw/2018/09/15/uw-byu-replay-a wards-inside-huddle-numbers/1297323002/> 's Take on BYU - Wisconsin <https://www.google.com/url?rct=j&sa=t&url=https://www.jsonline.com/story/sp orts/college/uw/2018/09/15/notes-injuries-andrew-van-ginkel-zander-neuville- costly/1297317002/&ct=ga&cd=CAEYDyoTODYxOTk0NDg0MjkyODIxODQ5MDIaODkxOWVhZGQy YzQ0MTJiODpjb206ZW46VVM&usg=AFQjCNHh9UlfgnSSYxpOk6SCX8pDnOHKjg> UW notes: Injuries to Andrew Van Ginkel and Zander Neuville add to the Badgers' pain <https://www.google.com/url?rct=j&sa=t&url=https://www.jsonline.com/story/sp orts/college/uw/2018/09/16/upon-further-review-mistakes-reveal-uws-deficienc ies/1306637002/&ct=ga&cd=CAEYACoTMzM0NzYxMTcyOTQ0NzEzNzMzOTIaZjM2NjU2NmQ2OWI yNDI2Yzpjb206ZW46VVM&usg=AFQjCNEeQo3lFctUpCV5GiKJjtrXRpcKsg> Upon further review: Can UW regroup and eliminate mistakes before Big Ten opener at Iowa? Best Highlight Video of Win <https://youtu.be/SL6ga5aqgUA> Basketball Recruiting Penn Puts BYU in its Place BYU made a good effort to land a basketball prospect named Max Lorca Lloyd. This past week, the 6-8 forward from Massachusetts, committed to Penn of the Ivy League. Click here <https://www.cityofbasketballlove.com/news_article/show/950335> to read more about Lorca, who appears to have been a BYU recruiting long shot. Something Doesn't Fit? Northern Colorado, Houston Baptist, Nicholls State, Brigham Young, Stephen F. Austin, Abilene Christian, Incarnate Word, Central Arkansas, Southeastern Louisiana, Northwestern State, Lamar. BYU seems out of place on the McNeese State schedule, which is all FCS schools. But wait, something does fit, BYU fits very nicely in the religious portion of this schedule. It includes such religious sponsored institutions as BYU, Houston Baptist, Abilene Christian and Incarnate Word. There are also some other fits. Heath Schroyer is the new head basketball coach at McNeese State and Ryan Pugh's wife's grandpa coached at Central Arkansas. The big fit in this game is fitting playing time in for some BYU freshmen. We may actually see Zach Wilson on the field for the first time this Saturday. Should We Be Surprised? To say Jeff Grimes, BYU's new offensive coordinator, has made an immediate impact on the BYU football program would be an understatement. Speaking of statements, one of my recurring statements going back 30-plus years, is that BYU has usually been predominantly coached by predominantly BYU connected coaches. It makes religious and ecclesiastically endorsed sense. Grimes is a good example of what a coach with a much broader experience and resume can bring to the program. I happened to stumble on his Wikipedia profile this week and it was fascinating to read, especially his coaching resume. I recommend it as must reading if you want to know how he has impacted BYU's program and why. Click here <https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeff_Grimes> to see for yourself. Television Timetable BYU vs. McNeese State (Football) Saturday, September 22 at Provo Kickoff: 4:00 pm MDT TV: BYUTV BYU vs. Long Beach State (Women's Soccer) Monday, September 17 at Provo Start Time: 5:30 pm MDT TV: BYUTV BYU vs. UVU (Women's Soccer) Friday, September 21 at Provo Start Time: 7:00 pm MDT TV: BYUTV BYU vs. Pacific (Women's Volleyball) Thursday, September 20 at Provo Start Time: 7:00 pm MDT TV: BYUTV BYU vs. Saint Mary's (Women's Volleyball) Saturday, September 22 at Provo Start Time: 1:00 pm MDT TV: TheW.tv
